Monthly Wrap-Up: October 2023

Wait, it’s November?!

Me, rushing to catch up with time:

My October consisted of an aching back & sore leg muscles, doctor visits, getting sick, celebrating one too many birthdays (Objectively, two is too much.), and bouts with my fleeting bursts of writing inspiration.

And you already know I haven’t been consistent with posting, so there’s that. :’D

But you know what? October was a great month. I enjoyed it. I might even be coaxed into doing it over again.

Imposter Syndrome

Ballet

As with most things, dancing with grace and poise (and turnout and core strength and strong legs and back flexibility and-) requires the cultivation of time and dedication. And don’t forget not only accepting that your feet will undergo irreversible changes but actively choosing that path. GremlinToes4Evah.

Ballet is a process, they say. You won’t see immediate changes, they say. It’s true, and I believe it. But, when doing it, you tend to question if you’ve been going about it wrong all along. Worse yet, if the issue is within you.

Wait a second. That’s me! Where did you find actual footage of my class?!

But that’s just me overthinking.

I’ve been doing ballet for a considerable amount of my life, and a possible contributing factor to why (WHY?!) I still do it is my not having stopped yet.

Yep, so I still do it because I did. Don’t question my logic.

Fun fact: a universal ballet rule is that the student must be silenced for chatting loudly with fellow classmates. Must! If you thought ballerinas were dainty creatures—shy, polite, and quiet—rethink that. Because the extrovert within us is unleashed during ✨ballet class.✨ (More accurately, time before and/or between ballet classes, but bear with me.)

I’m going to be dangerously honest and admit that my past community of budding ballerinas was relatively toxic. As toxic as 8-year-olds can go, which is quite far, believe me. I dreaded going to class every Saturday. But the same community plus a pandemic later, nearly everyone is getting along. With newcomers, too! I wouldn’t trade conversations with people who choose to torture themselves weekly (even daily for some) for a taco.

But multiple tacos? 😬 I’ll get back to you on that one.

(Shhh, secret info, but we student ballerinas don’t all choose this hobby. Ha, “hobby.” As if ballet isn’t 24/7. But I digress. Our parents choose it for us, and we stick with it because the gym and other sports are too easy. You didn’t hear that from me.)

Writing

Swan Lake~

I keep sporadically mentioning this, but I’m still working on Swan Lake. I, uh, wait. I’m aiming for novel length, and I’ve never done that before, so this is all *snort* novel to me.

Oh, gosh. That was terrible humor.

Anyway, is it normal to hit 10K words after 8 *cough* inconsistent *cough* months? Probably not, and that’s okay. I think. I hope.

I’m only on the first draft and wish I could change so much already. But I can’t! I can’t make that mistake! Not with everything I’ve heard about it. And *sigh* I’d rather be safe than sorry.

That Writer Friend

I thought my retelling journey would be a one-person job, but apparently not! I met a writer friend earlier this year with a love for Greek mythology and a familiarity with fairy tales. We’ve grown so close I’ve gone as far as showing her my messy Swan Lake first draft doc file. (Not normal. This is not normal, people.) First draft. I know, crazy. But I’m not a published author; there can’t possibly be risks with that.

She’s provided immense support and even made a work based on it. She recently told me how she loves my pieces, which include a few short stories I gathered the courage to share, and joked that I was her favorite author.

And she shared a part of SL with her mom!

What is this magical feeling?!

It’s suddenly all worth it.

Oh, Woe!

I read a translated short story set in Russia for Lit and was utterly disappointed with myself. I thought I was a genius when picking names for my characters, but those in my Russian ballet-inspired draft were the same as those in the story. My “creative” names were completely generic.

Blast my lack of knowledge with Russian anything! *kicks chair*

Fanfiction Mention

I should modify the heading; instead of “Writing,” why not “Swan Lake Rants”? (Ooh, an uncreative title. Write that down!) But to avoid that, I’ll add something else: I have these two contemporary fanfictions I’m so darn proud of, despite not having drafted them yet. Writing outside of YA is so fun because you’re a child and have these unrealistic views of how having an occupation works. The prospects? Endless!

Info Dump

I’m not a plotter. However, I do organize and write down usable information. Or perhaps unusable. The opportunity to insert a character’s height down to the centimeter has yet to present itself. That means I’m not a pantser, either. What even am I?

Speaking of which, you know those moments where you wonder why you write? My SL novel is a fantasy for a younger audience with a sweet, lowkey romance and a quirky narrator. Doubtless, someone’s written something similar and executed it lightyears better than me.

Then you get encouragement from kind souls (with superb taste), as mentioned above, and you realize…

Maybe there is a story only I can tell. Something unique. Something someone will love. They’ll pick up my book with low expectations, perhaps never before having heard of it, and then they’re whisked away. And when they return from the perilous journey, they clutch the book close to their chest, bug-eyed and magic-drunk, and mutter, “I want to do that again.”

Music

We’re still under the writing subheading. Whew!

I have this Spotify playlist with Old Disney songs with romantic and magical vibes, choice numbers from Swan Lake, a song from Anastasia, the ballroom background music from the Cinderella live-action remake, and “Over the Rainbow” by Judy Garland—not quite in that order.

During the dead hours when I’m sitting quietly, maladaptive daydreaming and all (which wasn’t diagnosed, but I fit the symptoms *sweats*), turning on this playlist is sure to boost the fairy tale & “I’m on Cloud Nine!” feels, and I couldn’t be more thankful. But who to thank? Spotify? Disney? Music? Let’s go with myself for making the playlist. *kisses mirror*

WARNING: The author in no way promotes narcissism to this extreme. Do not try this at home.

The four I keep coming back to:

Lea Salonga!!! ❤

Special mention because of the perfect royal romance feels~

Mid Goodreads

This grandma got a Goodreads account!

I’m clueless about adding friends, joining groups, and following someone, but I love seeing my reads in one place. And nearly everything is on there! Nearly. This Changes Everything by Jacquelle Crow, where? Where?!

I wanna pull a card on you guys and hit you with the “And because of newfound motivation, I finished 7 books this month. Ta-da!”

But nope. Four books are good enough for me. Plus, they were all a pleasure to read. Caraval, Tall Story, Chloe and the Kaishao Boys, & Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Oosh, I still have to write that post about Caraval, shouldn’t I?

---

That’s enough about me.

You can expect more content this month. You can, but should you?

I’m kidding.

I’m getting back into the groove! Welcome, new followers! And to those who’ve stuck around, THANK YOU.