Sketching generic girl faces and figures, plus a lot of side comments. I’d like to think I’ve improved since the last dump, but if you don’t agree, be brutally honest in the comments. I mean it.
I recently reread comments under my posts and am wondering why I skimmed over the encouraging compliments some kind souls left. That’s odd of me. I’ll make a mental note to bask in that later.
But that’s not what you came here for. Behold!
A Subtle Improvement
I believe I was going for a baseball fit, like something cute you can wear to a baseball . . . viewing. (I have no idea what it’s called. Bear with me.) But fun fact: I know nothing about baseball, except that it has a song with something about four strikes, and apparently, neither do I possess knowledge about the human eyelashes since I sure did go out all with the those the of above girl.
But I like her lone star earring and cap—both of which I’m surprised I didn’t mess up—and the fact that she looks genuinely happy. Good stuff.
Expect all my drawn characters to have a tooth-decaying joy on their faces.
And I still can’t draw men. PAIN.
Inspired by an Instagram post by a superb artist whose account name I forgot. I lost the link to where I got this, which is annoying.
I’m a bit irked that the details on her face are smudged, but that’s probably my camera’s fault. I wanna steal her jacket.
Did you notice where her headphones are connected? Yup. #stolenidea
An attempt at proportions. I cringed.Baby fingers.
I’m not too proud of these, but I once heard bad drawings are part of the process, so there.
Aurora fanart
I love the stylized way Aurora was drawn in the 1959 movie. Sure, she didn’t get as much screen time as her fairy godmothers, but did she still slay?
All the way, peeps. All the way.
Anastasia fanart
She’s basically a Disney princess now! I love how the animated movie portrayed Anya. She isn’t quirky, but her character still jumped off the screen. She wasn’t a girlboss but was still confident and assured. And she’s voiced by Meg Ryan, so what more do you need, am I right?
Ignore the weird muck on her elbow.
This one was an experiment with a slight style change, and I’m pretty happy with it.
But a side note: ballerinas don’t touch the curtains like this. What was I thinking? 😭
Ta-da! The last one’s from Pinterest, by the way. Something about a dancing reference.
Inspired by a Pinterest thing.
That Writer Friend™ told me this was how she imagined Odette, and I’m relatively flattered. I nailed the swoosh of her dress, but the lizard-long neck? Goodness no. I’m satisfied enough with her face, but the angle killed me. I had to erase and redraw that seventeen times. Er, ten. Twenty? Somewhere there.
Edit: Okay, looking at it again, that neck is . . . something else. It might have taken away from the rest of her body, which is why the parts below her shoulders look so cramped.
Unfinished Swan Lake art.
What do you think? Should I finish it? 👀
Moon girl on top; 2000s side character vibe girl on the bottom.
Inspired by Marilyn Monroe. If you squint your eyes, you might just see the resemblance.
codename: Cassandra
Round face represenatation! The revolver and hand are a yes for me. *chef’s kiss*
feat. my fingers
I got her proportions right on paper, but they didn’t translate. Tragic, I tell you. An absolute tragedy.
Her upper half, though.✨ But her hair looks a bit wonky. Let me fix that—
Perks of working with a pencil. 😎
Thank you for reading!
Imposter syndrome is more merciful in my art than my writing, which is reassuring and confuddling.
Share what you think, and [inserts what I usually say in these posts]. Yeah, I’m out of practice.
I’m back!!! November was pretty hectic. Between inconsistencies, sickness, partying, and an insane amount of ballet classes, I’d say this was a great month. Let’s recap it!
Back when I cared about my featured images. Good times…Not really.
Started: 12/10/2023
As I examine my calendar’s eleventh month of 2023, I realize…I should mark my calendar more. Perhaps [Little Sister] was right; my memory is little better than a goldfish’s.
Well.
Too bad!
If given the choice, I would’ve skipped this month’s wrap-up. A lot happened; I have something to write about, and heaven forbid that. Writing is supposed to be sporadic and inconsistent. You know, chaotic…right?
But then I discovered people enjoy things they can look forward to, like monthly wrap-ups, so my people-pleasing skills kicked in. And would you look at that—it benefited all of us this time! Of course, I had to postpone this as long as my dignity permitted. But. In the end, I hauled my patootie in front of my laptop, and here we are. Isn’t it lovely how things come to play?
No? Okay.
Lessons, Tests, Quizzes, Exams, Repeat
Ah, school. That glorious thing that consumes your youthful years.
I’m not coming on here and pretending I’m a star student (Top honors since I’m the only one in my class! =D), but I have this 100% healthy habit of being extremely passionate and working as hard as possible. The downside is when I get burnt out—which is often, considering I work harder than shrewder—I sidestep the task until the risk reaches alarming levels. Ha, I’m writing this now to avoid studying for an exam.
So, obviously, I’m the role model you should follow.
But you know what? I procrastinated by watching videos on how to stop procrastinating and found the YouTuber Elizabeth Filips, who gives helpful tips for ADHD-type people. I started here and gasped halfway through because, wow, I wasn’t alone!
And the people I relate with have ADHD! Does that mean I have it, too? And that, dear friends, spiraled into a whole other distraction, which is unimportant.
What is important is that I left with applicable information that worked for about a week. Then my bad habits kicked in, and…I’m fixing it. I’m hanging a mental “Construction in Progress” beside my desk and using time with which I could be productive in finding out why I wasn’t.
To think, I’d heard people praising her around the blogosphere and never even searched her name on YouTube. Why? Why?!
Then again, my problem isn’t knowing how and what to write; Reedsy has educated me quite well. The problem is to, you know, write. Sitting down, setting a word or hour count, opening Google Docs, and typing away is what my schedule is sorely lacking.
But that’ll be a rabbit trail into why mindsets of having to write and being a writer are two separate ideas, one of which can tap into low self-esteem and trigger hidden doubt, but pssh. No one wants to read that.
Attending a pArTy
Against my will—
I went to a dress-up party as Enola Holmes. (Translation: I left my house!!!)
Mother went all out with my costume this year and even said I looked the “most elegant” among the rowdy kids that day. I wore heeled boots and make-up. My eyeliner melted a bit after the first 3 hours, which a friend so kindly (and publicly:’)) informed me. But it gave a more I’m-a-child-without-parental-supervision-roaming-the-polluted-streets-of-London-and-totally-crushing-this-creep-with-a-bowler-hat-by-kicking-his-butt-with-my-cool-martial-arts-skills vibe, anyway.
(Watch Enola Holmes on Netflix, you guys. 👌)
Like this, minus a corset and the wine-red shade. Mine was a more vibrant hue, which threw off most of those who guessed who I was.
2/5 of the people who approached me recognized my character, and the rest shot me random names that I cannot, for the life of me, remember, even if a friend who went as a Men-In-Black agent put her dart gun to my head.
And I met two Sherlocks.
My self-prepping was similar to what I’d done on *cough* a similar day *cough*, constituting soul-crushing dread. A great ball of nerves lodged in my chest vibrated with every breath, weighing down on my lungs (I don’t think that’s normal), and a million scenarios of how things could go wrong played on a loop in my imagination.
But in the end, a friend from the mentioned “a similar day” and a fellow ballerina friend I used to have theatre classes with stuck close, and I don’t have that many regrets. Hallelujah!
Er, right, there’s one regret of stalking a guy by the commission of my bestie, and I could never be a super spy because of sheer embarrassment. Who knew starting conversations just to pry information out of people could be awkward?
Note to self: Leave the Cruising to Tom.
I ate nothing but free ice cream (because I wasn’t hungry, and if I were, you can rest assured I’d have devoured and wiped out the buffet fit for 100 or so students in less than 20 minutes).
The beginning of the five hours was fun, but the end dragged on. But overall, I enjoyed it. 7/10. Would probably recommend, but it depends.
In Loving Memory of Breanna’s Toes (R.I.P, Rest In Pieces)
Four ballet classes a week = pain. Pain everywhere. Quads, calves, shoulders, ankles, lower back, metatarsals, core, shins, you name it.
My two sisters and I were the few consistent attendees, so when the day for the recital drew near, we had to double the class days to prepare. My legs have yet to recover. I was even hesitant about the party because it fell on a ballet day.
But you know, having amazing classmates has its benefits. It almost means being shushed by the teachers for making so much chismis, a Tagalog word for “gossip” but not quite gossip. That’s a terrible explanation, but sometimes things don’t translate directly. I’m doing my best here. 🤧
Thank you for reading!
Ended: Date of Publication
Goodness gracious, this is late. Hohoho, Merry (early) Christmas, guys!
I want that sweater. But tropical country. ARGH.
Wouldn’t me making one unique post in favor of the season be cool? Wouldn’t it?
Oh, to dream.
How have y’all been? Did you forget about me? That’s a shame coz I’m popping back into the frame like a pimple breakout. Mwahaha.
The author reflects on a challenging, yet enjoyable October with events like multiple birthdays, sickness, strenuous activity, and sporadic writing. She discuss their long-term engagement with ballet, which, while demanding, has provided a vibrant social community. She’s currently working on a novel-length draft of Swan Lake, despite self-doubt and new experiences in writing. She also mentions dabbling in fanfiction and their recent inclusion in Goodreads. She promises more consistent posting in the future. ~AI, coz I’m lazy.
Wait, it’s November?!
Me, rushing to catch up with time:
My October consisted of an aching back & sore leg muscles, doctor visits, getting sick, celebrating one too many birthdays (Objectively, two is too much.), and bouts with my fleeting bursts of writing inspiration.
And you already know I haven’t been consistent with posting, so there’s that. :’D
But you know what? October was a great month. I enjoyed it. I might even be coaxed into doing it over again.
Imposter Syndrome
Ballet
As with most things, dancing with grace and poise (and turnout and core strength and strong legs and back flexibility and-) requires the cultivation of time and dedication. And don’t forget not only accepting that your feet will undergo irreversible changes but actively choosing that path. GremlinToes4Evah.
Ballet is a process, they say. You won’t see immediate changes, they say. It’s true, and I believe it. But, when doing it, you tend to question if you’ve been going about it wrong all along. Worse yet, if the issue is within you.
Wait a second. That’s me! Where did you find actual footage of my class?!
But that’s just me overthinking.
I’ve been doing ballet for a considerable amount of my life, and a possible contributing factor to why (WHY?!) I still do it is my not having stopped yet.
Yep, so I still do it because I did. Don’t question my logic.
Fun fact: a universal ballet rule is that the student must be silenced for chatting loudly with fellow classmates. Must! If you thought ballerinas were dainty creatures—shy, polite, and quiet—rethink that. Because the extrovert within us is unleashed during ✨ballet class.✨ (More accurately, time before and/or between ballet classes, but bear with me.)
I’m going to be dangerously honest and admit that my past community of budding ballerinas was relatively toxic. As toxic as 8-year-olds can go, which is quite far, believe me. I dreaded going to class every Saturday. But the same community plus a pandemic later, nearly everyone is getting along. With newcomers, too! I wouldn’t trade conversations with people who choose to torture themselves weekly (even daily for some) for a taco.
But multiple tacos? 😬 I’ll get back to you on that one.
(Shhh, secret info, but we student ballerinas don’t all choose this hobby. Ha, “hobby.” As if ballet isn’t 24/7. But I digress. Our parents choose it for us, and we stick with it because the gym and other sports are too easy. You didn’t hear that from me.)
Writing
Swan Lake~
I keep sporadically mentioning this, but I’m still working on Swan Lake. I, uh, wait. I’m aiming for novel length, and I’ve never done that before, so this is all *snort* novel to me.
Oh, gosh. That was terrible humor.
Anyway, is it normal to hit 10K words after 8 *cough* inconsistent *cough* months? Probably not, and that’s okay. I think. I hope.
I’m only on the first draft and wish I could change so much already. But I can’t! I can’t make that mistake! Not with everything I’ve heard about it. And *sigh* I’d rather be safe than sorry.
That Writer Friend
I thought my retelling journey would be a one-person job, but apparently not! I met a writer friend earlier this year with a love for Greek mythology and a familiarity with fairy tales. We’ve grown so close I’ve gone as far as showing her my messy Swan Lake first draft doc file. (Not normal. This is not normal, people.) First draft. I know, crazy. But I’m not a published author; there can’t possibly be risks with that.
She’s provided immense support and even made a work based on it. She recently told me how she loves my pieces, which include a few short stories I gathered the courage to share, and joked that I was her favorite author.
And she shared a part of SL with her mom!
What is this magical feeling?!
It’s suddenly all worth it.
Oh, Woe!
I read a translated short story set in Russia for Lit and was utterly disappointed with myself. I thought I was a genius when picking names for my characters, but those in my Russian ballet-inspired draft were the same as those in the story. My “creative” names were completely generic.
Blast my lack of knowledge with Russian anything! *kicks chair*
Fanfiction Mention
I should modify the heading; instead of “Writing,” why not “Swan Lake Rants”? (Ooh, an uncreative title. Write that down!) But to avoid that, I’ll add something else: I have these two contemporary fanfictions I’m so darn proud of, despite not having drafted them yet. Writing outside of YA is so fun because you’re a child and have these unrealistic views of how having an occupation works. The prospects? Endless!
Info Dump
I’m not a plotter. However, I do organize and write down usable information. Or perhaps unusable. The opportunity to insert a character’s height down to the centimeter has yet to present itself. That means I’m not a pantser, either. What even am I?
Speaking of which, you know those moments where you wonder why you write? My SL novel is a fantasy for a younger audience with a sweet, lowkey romance and a quirky narrator. Doubtless, someone’s written something similar and executed it lightyears better than me.
Then you get encouragement from kind souls (with superb taste), as mentioned above, and you realize…
Maybe there is a story only I can tell. Something unique. Something someone will love. They’ll pick up my book with low expectations, perhaps never before having heard of it, and then they’re whisked away. And when they return from the perilous journey, they clutch the book close to their chest, bug-eyed and magic-drunk, and mutter, “I want to do that again.”
Music
We’re still under the writing subheading. Whew!
I have this Spotify playlist with Old Disney songs with romantic and magical vibes, choice numbers from Swan Lake, a song from Anastasia, the ballroom background music from the Cinderella live-action remake, and “Over the Rainbow” by Judy Garland—not quite in that order.
During the dead hours when I’m sitting quietly, maladaptive daydreaming and all (which wasn’t diagnosed, but I fit the symptoms *sweats*), turning on this playlist is sure to boost the fairy tale & “I’m on Cloud Nine!” feels, and I couldn’t be more thankful. But who to thank? Spotify? Disney? Music? Let’s go with myself for making the playlist. *kisses mirror*
WARNING: The author in no way promotes narcissism to this extreme. Do not try this at home.
The four I keep coming back to:
Lea Salonga!!! ❤
Special mention because of the perfect royal romance feels~
Mid Goodreads
This grandma got a Goodreads account!
I’m clueless about adding friends, joining groups, and following someone, but I love seeing my reads in one place. And nearly everything is on there! Nearly. This Changes Everything by Jacquelle Crow, where? Where?!
I wanna pull a card on you guys and hit you with the “And because of newfound motivation, I finished 7 books this month. Ta-da!”
But nope. Four books are good enough for me. Plus, they were all a pleasure to read. Caraval, Tall Story, Chloe and the Kaishao Boys, & Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Oosh, I still have to write that post about Caraval, shouldn’t I?
That’s enough about me.
You can expect more content this month. You can, but should you?
I’m kidding.
I’m getting back into the groove! Welcome, new followers! And to those who’ve stuck around, THANK YOU.
A Christian Kid's Journal 